"Hmm.. what's going on?" you've wondered. Well, it depends on who you ask honestly. If you ask the school system they will tell you Caelan is in the Autistic Spectrum. And yes, I just threw the "A" word out there way too casually.... sorry for the shock factor. If you ask in a medical setting they describe Caelan as having sensory processing delays or problems. He is behind in speech and language, as well as some large and small motor areas.
I personally like the latter of the two explanations.
I'm going to jump around a bit. The current status is this-
Caelan is enrolled in the Early Childhood Program through the school system. He will get some Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy there along with contact with an Autistic counselor.
We also have him involved at Children's Therapy Corner (LOVE these people) where he gets more intense, one on one Speech and Occupational Therapy. That is the short version of it.
So going backwards in time now... I will explain the full story of how we got here.
Back in the Spring, probably around March... Matt and I started noticing Caelan is behind in his speech. We noticed this as we Skyped with my sisters one night and how well their boys (who are 5 months younger than Caelan) spoke and communicated. We looked at each other with the same look of "hmm.. are you noticing that difference too?" But we didn't talk too much about it. About the same time, a 'newer' friend of mine whom I had only known for a few months, asked me if Caelan talks at all or if he is nonverbal. I was shocked! She had to be kidding me! He talks from the time he wakes up until the time he goes to bed. Literally. So I asked our sitter if Caelan talks over there.... they replied, "No, not really. His needs are met; he will mimic what we say but...." Once again, shock factor for me!
He has always talked around us AND Matt's parents. We understand him. Mostly because we are around him all the time and understand his speech patterns and there is usually context to help. He hit a "shy" phase in January or so as well. He became much more timid in large settings, around people, new things.
So based on these discoveries about his speech and all, I decided to talk to his pediatrician.... she sent us for a speech eval. It honestly didn't go real well, Caelan wasn't very cooperative in the environment. I set up appointments... then found out that insurance woudn't cover it until he is 6 years old.... yes, SIX! I yelled at the poor girl in the insurance company who didn't have any control over that info... she was just the messenger. And I shot her. In spite of the old saying of not doing so.
So I cancelled all the appointments and sat in frustration about what steps to take. Abbi mentioned checking through the school system and the "Early On" program. So I set all that up. Someone came to the house, got a lot of history on Caelan, played with him.... a couple of weeks later the Speech and Occupational Therapists through the school also came over and interacted a bit. So we set up an appointment at their facility for a full evaluation. When I walked in, there were four people there (ST, OT and two new ones) and all of a sudden they are talking about Autism. I was there with Caelan.... after working a midnight shift, no sleep. I suddenly felt like I was in a tunnel. Their lips moved. I couldn't hear them. I was still stuck in another moment of time. Stuck in the word, THAT word. Once I found my breath (which I needed to do because I was feeling a little dizzy from the last sharp intake of air that I took and hadn't released yet), I stopped them mid-sentance. "How did we go from speech evaluations to talking about Autism??" I could tell from the glances around the room, that someone forgot to discuss everything with me. Each of them thought the other had already filled me in. They recovered well. Tina (I like her a lot.... she is the Speech therapist) knew how to get me back into the present time.
Once I got past this point, we were there for about three hours. They did a lot of standardized testing. Then we talked. In hindsight I understand some things a lot more than I did in the moment. One of those things is that the school system works in more of a "check box" system. "Does this child qualify for special assistance? Yes or No?" (check mark Yes). "If yes, what are the qualifiers?" Well, how about the fact that he failed (for a lack of better word) all the testing. The Speech and Occupational evals, the ADOS (Autistic Diagnostic Observation something or other) was off the chart.... Next on the checklist, "Which category? Autistic Spectrum or Developmentally Delayed?" Boy I love those options. Caelan was slotted into Autistic Spectrum Disorder.
People who know our son... who know our son, who have been around him since the day he was born... immediately shake their heads and say, "What?!? He is not autistic!!"
As the protective mother bear.... I agree. How dare they! As an open-minded, do what is best for my child, mom.... I read the reports and took a harsh look at things.
And I still wasn't sure.
He is a very, very loving child who loves to hug and snuggle. He makes eye contact. He talks (to us at least). He is really smart. He was an easy baby and is a very laid back little boy. He is happy.
He also... doesn't respond to his name all the time. He doesn't respond normally to sounds around him. He is fascinated with numbers and letters and shapes. He doesn't like slides or swings. He jumps... a lot. He sways from foot to foot. He doesn't call out to us in the same way that other kids do with their parents. He likes to watch things spin. He doesn't know what to do with toys other than "its intended purpose" He has an unusually long attention span for a child his age. He....
.. is my baby. My sweet, precious child. Who is smart and likes numbers and letters and books.... so? He likes to jump... so?
I was so torn. I couldn't deny a lot of what was pointed out to me. I spent a summer in 1998 with autistic kids. I see some of these "red flags." But I also don't see some of it.
So the agreement was to start him in Special Ed, Early Childhood Program this Fall. Which I did. It goes against everything I wanted to do, everything I believed in. But I did it.
But the problem was.... this all took place in early June. All of this was dumped in my lap with a nice big bow and a "Have a great summer, we will see you in September!"
WHAT???!!?? What am I supposed to DO?? What about NOW? What about the next four MONTHS??
So... enter next post.... Children's Therapy Corner. (Did I mention that I love these people??? good.)
I have to get ready for Caelan to come home.... I will complete this whole story. I told you it was long...
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